I've been on this whole self-promotion thing for this blog on Facebook all week--I know you know this. Thanks to all of you who have 'liked' the page, and even if you rolled your eyes when you received the suggestion, I still greatly appreciate the click. I may have a large ego and sense of self, but I'm pretty quiet when it comes to promoting, well, me. I'd rather someone stumble upon my greatness on their own and acknowledge me, rather than obnoxiously throw myself out there. But alas, I have given in, again as you know, and brought along my own version of a flash mob in hoodies to bombard your FB pages. So as pathetic as it may be, it was a new thing for me to do, so THANK YOU! Here are a few other things that I usually find obnoxious:
1.) Teen and Tween girls in a public loo: Look, I know that you're invincible and that you have all sorts of opinions about the girl at the table next to you, and you have to look perfect, etc. But when I walk through the door to, oh wait, use the facility because I have the bladder the size of a 2 year old when I've been drinking, do not give me that tired "What's she doing in here?" look. Really, no one else cares about Susie, or Bobby, or how terrible your parents are in a public restroom.
2.) Piggy Backers at Stop Signs: We all have places to be and we all run late, but dammit, wait your turn! Just because the guy in front of you went, it's not a traffic light, it's a little more civilized and everyone goes one at a time. Which leads me to, yes moron, it is a stop sign and you must STOP. Not roll through it or tap your breaks for a nano second, a full fledged stop.
3.) Bicyclists Who Want to Act Like Cars in Traffic, But Don't Abide by Driving Rules: Seriously, I really don't want to hit you, but when it is my turn to go at a stop sign and you come barreling through without looking, stopping, or even acknowledging that you're not the only one on the road, it just may happen. Also, as a pedestrian, don't ring your little bell at me to tell me to move--either get off of the sidewalk or abide by traffic rules when I'm crossing the street...because yes, it is all about me.
4.) People Who Invade My Personal Space in Lines at the Market or Convenience Stores: All I ask is for a 2 foot box around me. That's all. Stay out of it. Don't hover over my shoulder because you're in a hurry or because the person behind you is invading your space--I don't care, just stay the hell out of mine. When I'm at the pin pad sliding my credit or debit card, the last thing I need is your stinky ass closer to my face than my freckles. I've been known to threaten to fart on people or shoo them back when they haven't taken the hint of my elbow sticking out a foot off of my hip. True story, my friends.
Happy Friday, Everyone!
I couldn't agree more with each of the things on your list. Since Matt prefers a bicycle as his mode of transportation, and I'm paranoid, I'm hyper aware of bicyclists on the road, and hyper aware of their right to be there. BUT, I too cannot stand when they ride through stop signs and there's cars there. If I'm pulling up and haven't stopped yet, sure ride through w/o braking my friend. But If I stop and biker rolls up and continues through without pause, when I'm done my "S-T-O-P" pause, I get MAD. I also get MAD if they think they can ride the wrong way down a one way street, or on the wrong side of the road. They have a right to be on the road, but they better respect it and follow the same rules we all should. And as for bikers on the sidewalk, they are not actually allowed on there anyway, they're supposed to be on the road. So hold your ground, Jenn, block them and walk slower. And throw in a fart for them too, they deserve it.
ReplyDelete